Top Ten Film and TV Reveals

10. The Phantom of the Opera… as seen in Phantom of the Opera (1925)
Even some 90 years later the image of the Phantom as he is first revealed in the classic Lon Chaney silent version is an indelible image that still possesses the power to repulse and shock, so one can only imagine the impact it had in its day.

 

9. Norman Bates… as seen in Psycho (1960)
Oh mother! Another classic that still retains all of its power to this day, even if you know the true identity of the murderer, it is still an impressive reveal, and is one of double proportions if you count Mrs Bates in the rocking chair and that swinging light bulb!

 

8. Doctor Who… as seen in Doctor Who (1963 – Present)
No matter the Doctor, no matter the transformation, the regeneration of one Doctor to the next has always made for must see television. For me the most memorable has to be Tom Baker falling off a giant satellite dish and turning into Peter Davison via some bizarre figure dressed in white (dunno either) to the most emotional, that of David Tennant into Matt Smith. Tennant pretty much was the Doctor so we really felt his emotional exit and the humility he brought to his final moments, moments that had been deftly built over the course of a year of specials and three final episodes. This really was the end of an era as it also spelt the end of show head writer, Russell T Davies, who clearly left no emotional stone unturned.

 

7. An ape on horseback… as seen in Planet of the Apes (1968)
We are as gobsmacked as Chuck Heston and his fellow astronauts when the hunting horns bellow to the crescendo of horse hooves and the sight of apes on horseback with ruddy rifles. It’s the first reveal that Heston and co are on a whole darned planet of them. As shocking and memorable as the final Statue of Liberty shot is, for me, it is this first stark reveal that truly sets the tone for all that follows.

 

6. James Bond… as seen in On Her Majesty’s Secret Service (1969)
Connery had gone, James Bond was dead…but long live James Bond as another actor filled his shoes, namely George Lazenby. I can hardly comprehend on what the mammoth search for Bond must have been like or the anticipation of a new actor filling the role that Sean Connery had made his own. Cleverly, we are teased by the filmmakers who show us glimpses of Bond here and there in his rear view mirror behind the wheel of his beloved Aston Martin DB5 as he drives onto a beach to rescue a damsel in distress from some thugs. Once the villains are dispatched and the woman runs off and drives away in her car. Bond stands up and wryly talking directly to camera, the only time this ever happens, says to the audience as much as to himself: “This never happened to the other fellow!” A text book physical reveal that has rarely, if ever been bettered.

 

5. A Body Snatcher… as seen in Invasion of the Body Snatchers (1978)
It’s the final reel of the film and we are just relieved to see that Donald Sutherland, despite his Hair Bear Bunch barnet, is safe and not been nobbled by the pod people, but wait. He stops as Veronica Cartwright approaches, points, eyes roll and mouth opens distinctly inhuman like to let out one of the most chilling sounds and images ever to greet cinema going audiences. ‘They’ had finally caught up with him. The screen freezes and that image of Donald stays with you for ages after you first see it.

 

4. A Chest Burster… as seen in Alien (1979)
We know that John Hurt seriously hurts when he is flung around the Nostromo and that all is not well with his belly, in what is surely one of cinema’s greatest ever entrances as the aptly named chest burster, doing exactly what it says on the tin, and promptly shrieking as it exits Hurt’s body and splattering the white exterior crimson red. Primal stuff.

 

3. The Thing… as seen in The Thing (1982)
In the end the reveal is a massive relief of sorts, as you feel the anguish and paranoia of all the scientists and researchers sat on the chairs strapped to each other. We know the reveal is coming, but like those men on the chairs, we do not know when it is coming or from whom and we certainly aren’t prepared for what follows.

 

2. Doug Quaid… as seen in Total Recall (1990)
One of Arnie’s true classics I am of course talking about Arnie’s disguise as an overweight middle aged woman – thankfully not him in drag in the risible Junior – to get him through security before ‘she’ ends up with a facial tick of sorts only for her head to fall off and Arnie to step out from her as she opens up, with her head exploding as a bomb, as you do, with the immortal line “get ready for a surprise!” prior to detonation.

 

1. Keyzer Soze… as seen in The Usual Suspects (1995)
Who’d have thunk that weedy little Kevin Spacey was the murderous criminal mastermind behind it all. As ‘Verbal Kint’ states: “The greatest trick the devil ever pulled was convincing the world that he never existed.” It’s a bravura performance that doesn’t need prosthetics or a fake accent to pull it off. Spacey dragging his foot one moment, then walking normally the next and then miraculously regaining the use of his withered hand is misdirection of the highest order and never fails to delight. It is unsurprising that Spacey won a best-supporting actor Oscar for his mesmerizingly understated performance.

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The Best Old Skool Cameos

Remakes, reimaginings, reboots, revamps, call them what you will. Hollywood may perennially suffer from ‘sequelitous’ but it also has something of a soft spot for the remake and big screen reboot. Dean Newman checks out the best blink and you’ll miss em moments where the new remake kids on the block feature a nod to their originals.

10. Invasion of the Body Snatchers (1978)
It’s a masterful remake but it’s the small things that make this chilling paranoid classic really shine. A case in point is the moment when the star of the original, Kevin McCarthy runs into a car screaming that they are here already and the pure genius here is that this is exactly how the original film ended, with McCarthy running down a busy road screaming those very words.
This might have meant that he had been running for some 22 years but it also meant that in another sense it could be considered as something of a continuation of events  rather than just a straight remake. Genius.

9. The Incredible Hulk (2008)
Perhaps my second favourite old skool cameo is from Bill Bixby in The Incredible Hulk who didn’t let a little thing called death stop him turning up for a knowing nod and wink. Bixby is seen on TV in an episode of “The Courtship of Eddie’s Father” (1969).
Mr Marvel himself, Stan Lee, who has pretty much done an ‘Alfred Hitchcock’ in every Marvel movie, turned up this reboot as a man who slurps a soft drink contaminated with Bruce Banner’s blood.

8. Battle Beyond the Stars (1980)
A space-set riff on The Magnificent Seven from the pen of John Sayles and produced by one Roger Corman. It’s a film full to the brim of wonderful memories from when I was young and the crisp writing and early score by James Horner gives it some much needed weight. But the glue that holds this ragtag group of mismatched aliens together is surely Robert Vaughn, who of course appeared in the original Magnificent Seven. A complete guilty pleasure with able support from George Peppard, as a cowboy just in case you didn’t get it, John Saxon and John Boy from The Waltons.

7. Star Trek: The Next Generation (1987)
The pilot may have had DeForest Kelly passing on the Trek baton to the brand new crew in the very first episode but the best nod and wink to the original series was from the original ships transporter system. Its ceiling was now transformed into the floor of the brand new transporter. Recycling, the possibilities are endless.

6. Smallville (2001)
It has an irritatingly catchy theme tune and many may have labelled it Dawson’s Cape, but this series, which is set to take the crown as having the most episodes of any sci-fi show, treats those previous Superman incarnations with supreme reverence. And it’s an impressive roll call.

Christopher Reeve (Dr. Virgil Swann) played Superman in Superman (1978) and its three sequels; Terence Stamp (Jor-El) will forever be General Zod in Superman II (1980); Annette O’Toole (Martha Kent) played Lana Lang in Superman III (1983); Dean Cain (Dr. Curtis Knox) played Clark Kent in “The New Adventures of Superman” (1993); Helen Slater (Lara, Clark’s mother) played Kara/Supergirl in Supergirl (1984). Marc McClure (Dax-Ur) played Jimmy Olsen in Superman (1978), its three sequels, and Supergirl (1984), Margot Kidder (Bridgette Crosby) played Lois Lane in Superman (1978) and its three sequels. Teri Hatcher (Lois’s mother) played Lois Lane in “The New Adventures of Superman” (1993).

 

5. Robin Hood: Prince of Thieves (1991)
Until Russell Crowe went round hiding in bushes last year, Sean Connery was the oldest person to have portrayed the Hooded Man on screen, which he did in1976’s Robin and Marian. With nod, wink and a favour to old The Untouchable co-star Kevin Costner, Connery turned up as an uncredited King Richard at the end of Robin Hood: Prince of Thieves giving permission for Costner’s Hood to marry Maid Marian.

4. Dawn of the Dead (2004)
One of the better received remakes of recent years is Dawn of the Dead. For me it lacks the social and satirical bite of the original but a great effort with some memorable imagery. Getting in on the ‘brains’ action again were some of its original stars, including make-up supremo Tom Savini and Ken Forlee, who even gets another chance to give his classic line from the original – “When hell is full the dead will walk the earth”.

3. The Omen (2006)
Harvey Stephens, who portrayed the cute but evil moppet Damien in the original The Omen (1976), appears in this remake as the tabloid reporter (a devilish job if ever there was one) who asks Robert Thorn if the deceased nanny “was on drugs”. Apparently he is a property developer now after being a futures trader in London, almost jobs the devil would be proud of then.

2. Cape Fear (1991)
The classic Bernard Herrmann score made a welcome return, thanks to Elmer Bernstein, in this Martin Scorsese helmed remake and original stars, Robert Mitchum and Gregory Peck came along for the ride, as did Martin Balsam. Quality. Their roles this time round are played by Robert De Niro, Nick Nolte and Joe Don Baker respectively.

1.Planet of the Apes (2001)
Clearly written by a group of monkeys with typewriters this good-looking but completely vacuous retread is a major misfire from the mind of Tim Burton. At least original star, Charlton Heston, got to hide his embarrassment behind some admittedly good Ape make-up where he delivered a twist on his classic “get your filthy paws off me you damned dirty ape” to Marky Mark (no doubt in desperate need of a funky bunch of bananas).

Super Outfits

It’s London Fashion Week so (rather tenuously) Dean Newman lifts the cloak and spandex on what makes a super and not such a super superhero costume or superhero disguise as he counts down the five best and worst that superherodom has to offer as he strives for truth, justice and the American way, and has a good old rummage in some superfolks wardrobes.

The Best

Spiderman    
I never was a massive fan of grown men wearing their pants outside of their trousers, but Spidey, to me, was the real deal. Sure, like Clark Kent, Peter Parker was a mild-mannered reporter but it was the Spidey outfit, again red and blue (not counting the super cool 80s black get up) that really got me hooked. Darn it, its coolness couldn’t even be diminished in the poor 70s hash of a TV series. It reached levels of uber-coolness though under the artwork of Todd MacFarlane in the early 90s in the comics. Old web head’s outfit certainly sticks in the mind, if you’ll pardon the pun.

The Rocketeer
“An airborne Indiana Jones” so enthused good old Barry Norman back on Film 90 when this film came out, has it really been that long? Love the costume, which perfectly captures the 1930s feel of its setting, with a great helmet that looks like something off the hood of a car and a jetpack, with leather jacket. Did I mention that jet pack? Gleefully channelling both art deco and distant memories of the King of the Rocketmen serials.

The Punisher
Frank Castle and his family saw a mob hit. His family were taken out; Frank swears vigilante revenge and delivers in spades, quite literally as death himself, with an iconic death’s-head emblem on his costume. Subtle but stunning and even three trite film versions can’t lessen the impact.

Ghost Rider
Talking of skulls and vigilantes…Originally Johnny Blaze’s alter-ego in the 70s the dude with the flaming skull was resurrected in 1990 as teenager Dan Ketch who witnessed his sister slain thus becoming the new Ghost Rider, to great fiery effect, who had a spirit of Vengeance out to punish those who spilt ‘innocent blood’. The teenage Ketch is at odds with the violence by old fiery features so attempts to keep him at bay, unsuccessfully, rather like another green-skinned Marvel character.

Clark Kent
Is it a bird? A plane? No its Clark Kent. Okay, so for many this should probably by on the worst list but it takes the top slot for its sheer brilliance and the fact that pretty much every other hero has copied it. Sure it’s ridiculous that no one hasn’t thought that Clark, minus kiss curl but with added glasses looks at least a little bit like Supes, but it works. Comics aside, in the movies it works for one reason and one reason alone, Christopher Reeve.

For me it was never really about ‘you’ll believe a man can fly’, for me it was always about I believe a man can convincingly pull off two alter egos. Supes is pretty darn easy, it’s Kent that is the tough cookie and the makers of the latest reboot have a large pair of polished shoes and glasses to fill, the red boots and cape is the easy bit. Genius comic timing.

You only have to look at the performance of Christopher Reeve to see how convincing the act can be, the accident prone, dithering Kent is a masterstroke and as good as his Man of Steel is, it’s the portrayal of Clark that really seals the deal.

The Worst

Batman in Batman and Robin    
Holy chaffing Bat nipples! Nuff said.

Mighty Morphin Power Rangers
Such colours. Who knew that motorcycle crash helmets came in so many wonderfully bright colours. Sabretooth tiger indeed! Or perhaps they’ve all just got cold sores?

The Shadow
He’s the inspiration for Batman and he has a huge nose and hat and is hidden by a scarf. A big hit on radio in the 30s, the Alec Baldwin film of the same name didn’t exactly set the world alight, but then with such a nose and a scarf it may as well have been Nigel Havers going round with a bit of a cold. Hardly fills the criminal underworld with fear and dread.

Ben Grimm AKA The Thing and the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles
No, it’s not a money spinning team up, it’s the fact that both these sets of characters go for the rain mac and brimmed hat as the outfit of choice to act as a ‘disguise’ to keep them incognito. Really? Unless it’s worn by Columbo a rain mac looks pretty dodgy and makes them look even more suspicious if you ask me. For superhero mac wearing in style they should have taken a leaf out of Gambit’s book rather than looking like a dodgy gumshoe detective.

The Phantom
He’s always on about being the ghost that walks but he’s hardly ghost like in all that purple spandex. Was that really the greatest colour for the jungle? Not unless he’s endorsing Ribena its not!

Top Ten vampires from film and TV

10. Katrina (Vamp)
Grace Jones vamps it up to 11 with a typically flamboyant over the top performance as a seductive stripper vampire in the horror comedy, Vamp, where she manages to be both sexy and darned scary in this film that might give fans of From Dusk Till Dawn – this came first – the odd sense of Déjà Vu.

9. Jerry Dandrige
Remade with none other than David Tennant in the old Roddy McDowell role (fabulous casting), Fright Night, had Chris Sarandon (he always looked like he had too many teeth so was perfect) as a seductive vampire who moves next door to William Ragsdale. Essentially an updating of Dracula in suburbia this set the scene for a mini-revival in vampire movies, with everything from The Lost Boys, Near Dark and Vamp.

8. Dracula (Bela Lugosi)
He only nabbed the role after Lon Chaney met his maker. Lugosi had also performed the role to great acclaim on Broadway, his performance, with that look and that broken English is the image of Dracula we all know and is still the most oft-imitated in popular culture. Lugosi never could escape the character, even in death, as he was buried with his cloak! And he’s probably spinning in that as well as former American Idol host, Ryan Seacrest, now resides in his house. Now, that is the stuff of nightmares!

7. Mr Barlow – Salem’s Lot
No, not Ken, although he has been in Corrie since time began, so you never know! Most people remember Tobe Hooper for the Texas Chainsaw Massacre but first and foremost I will always think of his two-part, three hour adaption of the Stephen King classic, Salem’s Lot, with David Soul and James Mason. This has great visuals and music with set pieces that haunted a generation, from the wind in the woods to the scratching at the windows  (those poor little Glik boys)and shot backwards footage that just has eerie written all over it.

The first time we see the lead vampire though is an image that a whole generation probably never forgot, no even if they closed their eyes, it was still there

Whatever you do, forget Return to Salem’s Lot and also the Rob Lowe remake.

6. Dracula (Frank Langella)
Used to playing villains he’s played everyone from Nixon to Skeletor but Superman Return’s Perry White made for a formidable Dracula against Larry Olivier’s Van Helsing in the 1978 rendition, complete with big hair, of Dracula. Like Lugosi, Langalla came to the role having already stuck his teeth into it on Broadway.

Take away some of the 70s trappings and we actual have probably one of the most underrated performances of Dracula ever committed to film.

5. Dracula (Christopher Lee)
Christopher Lee played the role of the caped one an amazing nine times and it’s no wonder that it is still classed as his signature role. It also had a massive impact on a whole generation of filmmakers who grew up watching them on late night TV, so it is of no surprise that we see him being utilised in film by Spielberg, Dante, Lucas and Jackson…although it will never ever explain Police Academy 7: Mission to Moscow.
 

4. Martin
George A Romero isn’t just about zombie’s taking over the earth he’s also about neat little character studies like this as well. The most interesting thing about Martin, also the title of the film, is that he thinks that he is a vampire but he actually isn’t one.  Like Romero’s other work, and all great horror, it makes a stark commentary on society and is as haunting today as it was then. It shares some of the same themes as Taxi Driver, which is very much a horror movie in many ways. Thought provoking stuff and Romero’s own favourite film.
 

3. Selene (Underworld)
Girls, you can keep your R Patz we’ve got Kate Beckinsdale in Underworld. Sure it might be all Matrix-esque in its style but that still doesn’t mean we can’t enjoy the carnage in-between…and all those lingering shots of Kate in her tighter than tight rubber outfit of course.

The sequels were awful but the original has bite and action aplenty, showing those Twilight folk how to really do a battle between Werewolves and Vampires.

2. Angel
For me, leaner, wittier, darker, edgier than Buffy, this LA set spin-off had a more grown up feel about it, with Angel’s past owing more than a nod and a wink to Interview with a Vampire in the style stakes. Cinematic in scope, the show hit the floor running with an amazing scene where Angel throws a vampire in a board meeting out of the window of a high rise building, chair and all, with the vampire bursting into flames in the LA sun. It also ended as it began with Angel and co with their very own Butch and Sundance moment against a whole series of beasties, in between that we also had the rather excellent episode where Angel was cursed and turned into a muppet-like character for most of the episode, still voiced by Boreanaz of course. Inspired and did that rare spin off thing of stepping out of the shadows from the show from whence it came.

1. Nosferatu
Salem’s Lot’s vampire had more than a sinister nod in the looks department to the granddaddy of all screen vampires. It may be silent but being a piece of German Expressionism, the pictures speak a thousand words.  The titular role is played by Max Schreck, which, uncoincidently, was also the name of Christopher Walken’s character in Batman Returns. The ‘making’ of Nosferatu was also the subject of Shadow of the Vampire, which supposed that Schreck, magnificently portrayed by Willem Dafoe, was an actual vampire!

Beard to the Bone – Top Ten Movie Beards

Dean Newman ditches the razors and shaving gel as he takes up some method writing as he investigates cinema and television’s love of bearded bad guys and why no discerning villain should leave home without one.

Hans Gruber
As seen in Die Hard (1988). Altogether now, “shoot the glass.” Perhaps the sharpest dressed movie villain ever, this was Rickman’s film debut and he was handpicked for the masterful role after being spotted playing the thoroughly nasty Valmont in Dangerous Liaison on Broadway. Chill at the way he offs the Nakatomi plaza boss with aplomb and cheer as he falls to his death in slow mo, the greatest such fall moment in cinematic history folks, from x amount stories high.

Mr Dark
As seen in Something Wicked This Way Comes (1983). Perhaps most shocking in this film, which deals with many dark aspects and is an effective and sometimes shocking, especially for younger viewers, thriller, is that it is from cuddly wuddly studio, Disney.

Based on a Ray Bradbury novel we see the evil Mr Dark and his circus arrive in town and promise to make everyone’s dream come true, but only at the great price of giving up their souls. A deal with the devil. And in that role is a devilishly good Jonathan Pryce, a character he haunts forever once you have seen it, especially as a child.

The Sheriff of Nottingham
Panto is perhaps the best way in which to describe Rickman’s version of Robin Hood’s foe, stealing not just his scenes but the whole darn movie. Put that in your outlaw pipe and smoke it Hooded man! Had great fun ‘cancelling Christmas’ and demanding to have people’s hearts ‘cut out with a spoon…because it will hurt more.’

Dr Hans Reinhardt
As seen in The Black Hole (1979). Essentially he’s the Captain Nemo of the piece (important not to mix the Nemo influence and Captain Birdseye up, as he’s more likely to turn children into fish fingers than feed them to them). Like all good captains he goes down with his ship. In fact he is that evil that he even has Norman Bates himself offed!

Hugo Drax
As seen in Moonraker (1979). For me this is a real guilty pleasure and Drax, a superb Michael Lonsdale, delivers some of the finest Bond villain lines such as: “Mr Bond, see that some harm comes to him.” Takes a giant leap for mankind in a classic Bond death as he is jettisoned into space.

The Master
As seen in Doctor Who (1963 – Present). Not the latest incarnation, as (over) played by John Simm or the diabolical TV movie, as (over over) played by Eric Roberts, but as masterfully portrayed by both Roger Delgado and Anthony Ainley. At this time The Master was very much the Moriarty to The Doctor’s Sherlock Holmes and this will forever be The Master’s most iconic appearance. In fact he also had a beard as portrayed by Jonathan Pryce in the Comic Relief spoof “The Curse of Fatal Death.”

General Zod
As seen in Superman 2 (1980). Kneel before Zod! His Geography might not be up to much (planet Houston anyone) but his boo hissness and delivery makes the General, as portrayed by Terrence Stamp, the greatest comic book big screen villain ever, yes even better than Ledger’s Joker.

Stamp is clearly having fun playing it oh so straight and camp at the same time and who doesn’t wince at that hand crunching scene. The only shame is that they never found a way of bringing him back. I mean, Richard Pryor and Nuclear Man, c’mon! Stamp’s Zod is also just so iconic.

Ming
As featured in Flash Gordon (1980). He’s supreme Emperor of planet Mungo and merciless don’t you know. Sporting more than a passing resemblance in beard to Fu Man Chu the 1980 experience was a veritable clash of the beards, Ming’s to the left and the beard of the leader of the Hawkmen, as wrapped around the bombastic chops of one Brian Blessed, to the right.

He amuses himself by destroying other planets in the solar system, has numerous concubines, kills anyone who gets in his way and seems to have a thing for S&M with all those outfits about. All good clean family fun then. Go Flash, go!

Evil Twin Beards
As seen in Star Trek and Knight Rider. The mirror universe of Star Trek more or less gave us the cliché of the Evil Twin with a Beard of Evil, as evil Mr. Spock has a goatee, how illogical!

Also enter, driving K.A.T.T., Michael Knight’s Evil Twin, Garthe Knight, sporting a beard of evil. It has to be noted that the car didn’t sport an LED beard of evil. Personally, I think every TV show should have an episode with a goatee wearing Evil Twin, even the female characters! I’m not sure what that says about those episodes of Friends with a goatee wearing Chandler though. Hmmm.

I could do with a beard myself, to stroke, as I ponder that very thought.

Hanna

Starring: Saoirse Ronan, Eric Bana, Cate Blanchett
Directed by: Joe Wright

This is very much the girl who played with firearms. From the outset we are shown that The Karate Kid this isn’t, with Hanna introduced as a longbow wielding moppet who might still be learning her craft, but is someone very special (ops) indeed.

I’d seen Angelina Jolie do her secret agent stuff in Salt, which I felt was more than a bit lacklustre and whilst Hanna had her moments, great shining moments of brilliance, it didn’t have that zip along feel like say The Long Kiss Goodnight. In the female espionage stakes it’s perhaps fairest to compare Hanna to La Femme Nikita and Leon (Hanna and her sisters perhaps?), both of which have a very European feel about them, something which Hanna echoes in its locations, several actors and it being helmed by a British Director.

Best described as a coming of age drama slash fish out of water thriller it’s an effective if not typical thriller that I willed and wanted to stay in high gear for more than a couple of minutes at a time but it would always seem to take its feet off of the accelerator as soon as it had floored it. I don’t mean it has to be wall to wall action and ‘Bayhem’ but it did seem to stutter and feel rather uneven in places.

When it roars it really shines, such as a bravo steadicam shot that follows Eric Bana being stalked by agents through a subway, who he then subsequently fights, all in one glorious single shot, which really ramps it up but is practically over as soon as it begins. And another standout moment is a glorious set piece in a container yard that again peaks your interest but is over as soon as it has begun.

In many ways it felt like it was harking back to 70s thrillers, like say Marathon Man, pacing wise with facts slowly revealed throughout the film and events slowly occurring. That’s certainly not a negative as I love Marathon Man, but I think the complaint is more to do with the fact it was marketed as a high-octane junior version of Taken. It’s quite simply a good old fashioned revenge film.

Cast wise, Saoirse Ronan is amazing as the 16 year old Hanna and does nothing but convince as first and foremost a girl who has lost her innocence, especially in some of the scenes with the family, and equally impressed as a steely assassin. Her scenes with Eric Bana all bristle with electricity. Cate Blanchett is a good villain, far better than she was in Kingdom of the Crystal Skull, but I couldn’t help but see her as Jane Horrocks from those supermarket ads from a couple of years back.

I really wanted to love Hanna, I really did, but unfortunately I could only like it. The story is certainly intriguing and you really want to stick with it and see it through to its conclusion and it’s certainly something fresh in a (another) year of sequels and tepid remakes but it still stops and starts too much for my liking. Without giving too much away it has a great bookending and any film with a death by biro has to be worth a look, right? The tag line for the film, and also a line from the film, was adapt or die, and whilst it far from dies it isn’t fully adapted, ironically perhaps like most normal 16 year old teenagers, it’s a little bit awkward.

3/5